OUTSIDE ROADS

On the silvery mirror of the restless shimmering lake, the gentle boat is still swinging, lost in its own ring. In it two heroic men with clasped hands hesitate. Fair daughter of Poseidon! Hold out to me your redeeming hand. In the midst of the whirlwind storms of my soul, for doubt and the piteous suicidal coward's moment of grief have been around me for days, poisoning the wells of my soul. When once every sinful circle comes to an end, If I take no heed - it closes in on me! 

My hesitant loving heart also loves to see clearly the connections of earthly things that tremble firmly. Often it questions my pensive, sober judgments, my reason seems to turn against me. My soul: a besieged, much-sacrificed ruin, my love teases at its closed gates. - Outside, crows settle on the still trembling skeletal arms of oaks, cawing and sobbing, for they know: all passing is also a wasteland, it is worthless if the cycle of rebirth does not follow the laws of Being! 

I still watch the ancient dance of the seasons, and give secret aerial signals to this world as a messenger that I am still here! Stubbornly I still try to stand still on the changes of the ages of Being measurable by reason. I am always afraid that in a shower of rain, when the sacred petal melody of flowers opens, in whom can I still trust, who can make me hope again? 

For my despair grows daily greater with insidious, cunning despair. Where else can I find the faithful, dear companion, Who with unselfish tenderness will lighten my spiritual burdens? The poisonous bile-taste of non-existence I know well now, For daily I am forced to swallow, if I am forced to endure. And so now! I could learn a bravery that would defy the world, - for that's the only reason - I will not give myself a more just cheer! 

Darling, my angel! Where are you that I may hold your blessed fairy hands outstretched to me at our late meeting?!