Not new either

 
Into the eyes of reverse mirrors - alas, but I have looked many times. I measured my wasteful, clumsy misfortune, my forgetfulness among crystal shards. A friend and an acquaintance - too little - why did he leave a long time ago?!

Now I wander alone on the ruins of landless, landless days. Among my fears, there are still many solidified, holy superstitions - I have nowhere and nowhere to escape from my present.

My past has long since been cursed, while my future is always uncertain. How many coquettish, propaganda-mouthed, duplicitous messengers should be listened to out of necessity, in order to finally realize that here on this earth, everything is standing in the way of the so-called permanent changes.

You should learn not to live - but to tolerate and hope, because there can be no new things here, only bogus, brainwashed tinsel. I won't share pearls or pearls anymore. I hide the truth-telling loyalty-consolation of tears in my wounded, sick heart stoically-silently, just in case someone notices, who is hiding behind the soft, soft exterior?

Where I stand now, I can no longer have a sought-after path, nor an individual goal; the wall-labyrinth of self-pity, broken down to the bricks. Even so, I can quickly scrutinize the twinkling of stars, but only very few remain that I could truly find worthy of the noble, the good!

My day mirrors my even weirder tomorrows. More than I am, rarely if I can. Diligent builders, promise-makers, haughty Gods have deserted me. Even now, I live among doubts and fears, in silence and cowardly. Many times I hardly have the strength left to start all over again - this time with promises of second chances. Ouch! I was suddenly tempted by autumn again, my soul trembles with devilish convulsions!