An up-to-date, tumultuous spirit

  
It could easily have been a holy and inviolable loneliness that accompanies you even beyond the otherworldly grave. It could have been a happy and satisfied holiday in the ruins of days, which does not need to be reciprocated. The answer to flirtatious glances could have been romance, childish playful hesitance. Rather than the public humiliation of crocodile tears, it's more like a baby shower, a gentle teasing. It could have been thirst-quenching longing kisses in the pitch-black, when everything else is sleeping in silence, a secret, fearfully guarded angel caress between tender, fading petals.

It could have been a decent, simple real family and a home where it is always good to return to, to find an understanding and caring shelter. It could have been a superstitious twist, in which body to body through chemistry and desires leads to the united Allness of souls. It could have been a defenseless, flickering, tiny flame or a fiery eruption of lava rising up and rising, an eternal hope that, no matter how trampled on the road, always rises and sets off.

It could have been a timid, mumbled repentance over the phone. There could have been certain forgiveness in the cursed, pitiful life where everything was already broken in two. It could have been a woman's heartbeat radiating with happiness, which could still be filled with immortal love and the happy buzzing music of spheres. It could have been a hissing silence, which should be listened to with due politeness. It could have been a loving look hiding behind laughing honey sunbeam smiles, which is indispensable and addresses you forever! He could have been infallible, and for that very reason he had a legitimate peace, which does not ask for, does not coerce, unnecessary permissions - but always forgives those who deserve it. It would have been possible to live and be happy without the dreaded fears and self-doubt!