HERITAGE-BREAKDOWN

Sooner or later, I feel, this world will bite me, devour me, destroy me! He knows well: he leaves behind him blood to perish; not only family, friends, nor house - but perhaps man leaves an example for someone. The tiny footprints of a whole existence to bear witness to. For it was a time of terrible adversity, and there was much to endure: many a fool smiled and grinned like a fool, like the powerful, and the holy movement to save values seemed even more hopeless. Is it any wonder that, though suicidal thoughts were in my muddled head, I did not remain so dumb and faithless!

To endure the good intentions and honest words of a friend, and those who hurt me or trampled me in the mud I did not hang my moustache on them, I retired to my room with the book-cave in voluntary emigration and preferred to read. That was all that remained of me: my only value of any value. If it were not for the ruthless profit-driven here on earth, this weak and fallen man could humbly preserve the documents and instructive messages of the current times. - Whoever may come after me as a messenger, do not accuse my attempts to save my bloodline of frivolity, do not throw away my bloodline in your irresponsibility! What may be left with benevolent empathy and compassion, please do not harm!

I wrote this, hunched in questioning under a hundred burdens of trouble: in my hundred bacterial diseases, in my petty hypochondriacism - that was just enough for me. Whoever you decide to put on the resumable gloves of culture, don't be petty; it's all that's left of a life of living witness. Oh! Drowsy, labour-losing Nirvana World, thy doubts have almost driven me to the hangman's gallows, that the starving crows may feast on my fat flesh. Thy thorny golgotha-gibbets have often wounded; What thou once possessedst as pondering knowledge, the light of reason now caring, take good care of it! Thought-awakening treasures I would leave here now- Let them be a witness for generations to come!