the demon inside

When I cannot move and cannot scream 

The demon in my head breaks free

It terrorises me like a cat with a mouse

As it gets closer with every lifeless breath

I scream but my voice seizes to exist

I cry but my tears dry up 

I run but my legs have no feeling 

I close my eyes but they are pinned open wide

the demon climbs my wall and dangles from my ceiling 

It talks to me in a deep, menacing tone

It laughs at me and calls me names

Tells me I’m worthless, makes me feel pain

I shake and scream but to no avail 

I shake and scream but to no gain

The torment lasts a short while but feels an eternity 

As the echoing voice fades away so do my fears, my numbness, my seizures

I wake up in a pool of sweat and yet am frozen to the bone 

The demon inside of me has found his way home 

who am I?

Everyday my Identity doesn’t stay the same 

It’s changes with whomever I meet, it changes with every hello and every hey 

I get confused by which side I am on

Or if I am in both 

Both sides intrigue me

Both sides keep me close

When I have one, I want the other 

And when I have them both I want none 

My lifestyle is confusing so I had to try it once 

Till I reached my climax and things just got worse 

My feelings get more confusing with every single verse 

But I’ve learned how to live and I’ve learned how it works 

I couldn’t go back to a life of lies

I couldn’t go back to being just one same guy

the mirror

I Look in the mirror and all I see is pain 

The reflection is the only one who doesn’t laugh at me 

I see optimism crushed under the oppression of everyday life 

We are dreamers being forced to wake up

I sit and stare at the mirror and I don’t like what I see

Judging ever flaw, every blemish, and every problem about me 

I wonder if things might ever get better for me 

The glass shattering will be the only thing to set me free

I can’t judge no more and from the shackles I lose

No more pain, no more scars, no more bruise