Appreciation

No one ever appreciates the beautiful thing in life until the thunderstorm hits 

That’s when they pray for better days and for the storm to go away forever 
by then it’s to late to take back what was already washed away by storm

No one ever appreciates the beautiful things in life until the sun shines to bright 

That’s when they pray for the clouds to cover what they aren’t ready to face 
by then they can’t find the way to the shadows because they never took the time to buy sunglasses

COLD

As it stood in front of me 
so lifeless...

But I couldn’t be afraid 
because it was a reflection of me 

It slowly began to come close to me 
but I couldn’t move 

Because I accepted it in my soul 

It began to walk towards my reflection 
I felt my heart turning cold 

Then i realized I was talking to my soul...

Expensive Love

Your love was too expensive 
more than you knew I could afford

I was determined to keep you to myself

I paid for everything

my PAIN
your HAPPINESS

my TEARS
your SMILE

I placed my soul in your hands 

I invested everything into loving you

It was never good enough because you kept asking for more 

but i was already empty

You took everything from me

You left me hollow

Your love cost me everything...

She

She protected herself from everything 

She hid her emotions from everyone because she feared being hurt 

She didn’t realize the pain she was causing herself by shutting down

She felt as if everyone would judge her if they knew what she really been through

She never wanted love because she knew the pain that came at the end

She never gave anyone the chance to understand her because she been hurt to much

She never knew real happiness so couldn’t search for something she doesn’t know 

She is me

Why do I write?

I write because it feels better than therapy 

I write because it's better than constantly hearing  

"Oh, I'm sorry"
“Yea, I understand"

or nothing at all but that blank stare people give you when they are trying to act like they care

I write because this is the closest things to drugs that will help me escape this reality

I write because it's the only way I can understand what is going on with me 

I write because it always reminds me that i will be okay